30 Things I Love Right Now

by laura didyk

1. The Situation and the Story by Vivian Gornick.
2. This, from the above:

We had all used the river, the heat, the remoteness to frame our stories. Beyond that, how alone each of us had been, sitting there side by side on that raft, carving out of our separating anxieties the narrator who, in the midst of all that beauty and oppressiveness, would keep us company—and tell us what we were living through.

3. And this from same:

I began to see that in the course of daily life when, by my own lights, I act badly—confrontational, challenging, dismissive—I am out there on that raft before I have found the narrator who can bring under control the rushing onslaught of my own internal flux. When I am doing better, I am able to see that the flux is a situation.

4. When I am doing better.
5. Helpful, long-ass conversations with Birmingham, AL.
6. Best (solicited) imperative advice I’ve received so far about my current writing angst(s): Blindly muddle forward.
7. How when I read that statement, I want to roar like the MGM lion, which is maybe the point. Roar, then muddle forward, roar again, muddle forward some more. And so on. (I like this one best):

8. Smoothing music. (I meant to write “soothing” but the typo works better).
9. REM.
10. 1983.
11. Remembering!:

12. And this! (I feel I could watch these people jog in place in unison to this music until the end of time):

13. Questions.(If you watched the above video to the very end this one will be more fun)
14. More questions.
15. Answers, and, yes, more answers.
16. The word: Practice.
17. Practicing.
18. That all my plants are still alive (miracle).
19. That I have concern for them.
20. A walk.
21. Rain, 72 degrees, low humidity.
22. Bird sounds.
23. Q & A with self regarding certain aspects of my current writing project (inspired by AJF’s writing exercise) :

Q: What do you think [all your moving around from state to state, town to town] was about?

A: Trying to get comfortable—literally—on every level. I’m not unique I realize. We all do this in different ways. We try to find a way out of the human experience. Like somehow, maybe, we can be the exception. Beat the heat. Some go at this harder than others. Some have their limits to what they’ll do in order to be successful in that endeavor. Others have zero limits. Those people generally die. Or come close. (Back in my early 20s, I had a lot of limits, but as the years went by and life happened, those limits fell away one by one. This was not a good thing. It wasn’t a bad thing either. It was, if anything, unfortunate—unfortunately inevitable.) What you don’t realize when you’re in the midst of your own version of “trying to get out of” the human experience is that the “trying to get out of it” IS the human experience (or at least a big part of it).

24. Getting to the point.
25. Getting the point.
26. The point itself.
27. How quickly the point falls apart.
28. Watching it do that.
29. My situation.
30. My story.